"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me"(This is my all time favorite Bible verse, and it really spoke to me in the last few weeks.)
Having said that...
Y'all, I need to take a moment to brag on my husband. Also to take a moment to boast about how really super happy I am right now. It really hit me last week when I was reading Liz's blog, Simply Complex Mom. She had a post about Foreboding Joy. How we force ourselves to be unhappy... like we're always waiting for the next bad thing to happen. Oh. My. Gosh, y'all I cannot tell you how much that post spoke to me.
Do you know how much I have doubted my decision to not go back to work? A LOT. I've texted several girls from my tribe, and all of them have reminded me that ultimately it's the best choice I've made. They've reminded me that I AM contributing to the house. I'm making sure the kids are cared for, cleaning, cooking. I am working. Sure, I'm not bringing any income to the table, but I AM helping.
That. That right there is so easy to forget, y'all. Especially when the crap does hit the fan and, if you're like me, you feel awful about not bringing in any income!
A few weeks ago, Josh's car (the ONLY car we have) stalled out while he was driving home from work. Luckily he was able to get it to a shop so they could look at it. We were thinking it was just the spark plus. WRONG. $1,300.00 later, the car is working. And I'm freaking out about how we're going to make it. How are we going to feed the kids?
Let me tell y'all something, between my friends... my tribe... and PRAYER I was able to chill the EFF OUT! I gave it to God. I let it go.
And then it hit me like a ton of bricks. Last week, in the middle of the week of all things, all of the bills were paid. All of them. And you know what, y'all? We even had enough left over to where we could get Zander a little something for his birthday. (I was thinking he'd have to get a belated gift from us because we wouldn't have anything extra). That wasn't the case. And you know what? I wasn't relieved. I wasn't excited. I was content. I was 100% happy, and I realized that I had 100% faith that we could do this.
Because of my husband working so hard, getting overtime, working the occasional weekends, we CAN DO THIS. Josh didn't panic once about our situation. Sure, he got upset that the car needed repairs, but not once he did freak out about anything else. I'm definitely appreciative for what we have. Our home is full of love. We may not be able to go on fancy dates anymore, or go to the movies every weekend. But that's OK. What we have is enough, and I may need to remind myself of this a million times a day going forward, but it's true. We have each other, the kids, God, and love. It's like the verse in the picture says,
"Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." - Ecclesiastes 4:12With my husband by my side and God in our marriage, I am confident we can get through anything. Plus, it really helps that I have some amazing friends just a text or phone call away!
