Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Never Would I Ever...

Did Y'all ever play that drinking game, "never have I ever". Whatever the person says they "never" did, if you did it you'd have to drink? Yes? No? I know Amanda has played it because I've played it with her. Motherhood can be a bit like this drinking game. You get pregnant, and you immediately start imagining how you're going to be like when you're a parent. "My kid will never watch TV while I cook." Then the next thing you know, you're the mom taking a swig of your adult beverage because your kid totally watches TV while you cook. [raises hand] been there, done that, bought the T-Shirt.

Never Would I Ever... Until I did...
Linking up with Christine, Brittany, and Ashley for Mama Tells All
Mamas Tell All

I was totally "that" mom. The mom that swore to all of her friends and family the things her children would NEVER do; or the things I would never do as a mom.
Yeeeaaaahhhh.... all of that pretty much flew out the window as soon as I was home from the hospital.

Feb 2014 / see? They're fine.

"My kids will never have a pacifier". They did take a pacifier. Zander stopped using his at 13 months, and Ainsley stopped using hers at 19 months. (so, a week ago!) haha. Let's face it. Sometimes babies just want to suck on something. You know they're not hungry. You know they're really ok. Sometimes sucking on that pacifier is the only thing to calm them down because 1) they haven't figured out their fingers work just as well, 2) you're bottle feeding and they can't keep a bottle in their mouth ALL day long, or 3) you're breastfeeding and you really don't want the baby comfort sucking on your boob ALL day long! (Uh *raises hand*, right here on that one, y'all!)

"Watch T.V. before they were two". Wrong again. Especially with Ainsley. Zander saw his first cartoon at 18 months. Thanks, Uncle Mike for babysitting. haha. But seriously, I was a real bitch about this one for no reason at all. Sure, you don't want to let your kids watch too much t.v., but there are just some moments when you need to finish the dishes or run the mop or whatever, and you just can't do it when the kids are dying for your attention. Ainsley got to watch t.v. at a real young age. I wasn't about to hide her from the cartoons if Zander got to watch them. PBS Kids actually has some really educational shows now-a-days, y'all. I admit to getting sucked into Super Why! when the kids have left the room. Guilty.

"I'll never let my kids go to bed with a bottle". Seriously though, y'all... moms have to sleep right? When both of my kids got to the age where they were waking for milk and they could hold a bottle - you better believe I changed their diapers, gave them a bottle and went right back to bed. Zander had it way more than Ainsley. He even went into toddlerhood with sippy cups in bed. Some kids require more to get to sleep. It just happens. And guess what? He's been to the dentist four times now for cleanings (twice last year and twice this year) and not once did the dentist say he had a problem with his teeth from "bottle rot". He's fine. Ainsley is fine. Trust your guts, moms.

     And just a few things I do that some moms don't agree with all the time:
I'm not a helicopter mom. I don't hover over the kids. I let them play how they want to play. If this means they fall, so be it. **In relation to this, Ainsley totally fell about 6 ft while we were at the playground this past weekend. She didn't even cry... because...

I don't make a fuss over falls and scrapes. Sure, I make sure the kids are OK, but if nothing is broken and they're physically OK I make sure they see that they're OK on my face. If I were to freak out over every little thing, then if something as small as tripping over a rug were to happen the kids would make a big deal about it. Parenting is all about acting, y'all.

I parent my own way. I do what feels right. Did I go into parenting thinking I'd be doing this differently? Absolutely. Do I regret changing my mind about what I thought I'd do? Not at all. Raising my kids the way Josh and I want to is the best decision we could've ever made.

linking up with Anne for Wednesday Wishes as well
Love the Here and Now
I wish new parents all the courage and strength to just go with their gut. Don't do something when it comes to parenting if it doesn't feel right to you. I wish for all of the moms reading this week's Mama Tells All prompt gives them some sort of relief that what they're doing is OK if they're having doubts about it.


27 comments :

  1. I'm a Super Why! fan, too!! My firstborn lived off PBS kids while I was pregnant with his baby brother.

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  2. Haha! They've really upped the show quality for some compared to when I watched pbs as a kid. All I had was sesame street and Barney. What I love now is my oldest will spell words along with princess pea!

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  3. What a great prompt! I know I say stuff now that I will never do, but when the time comes I probably will. I okay with that, it happens. You're an awesome mom, your kids are the cutest, just keep doing what you're doing!

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  4. I love this. I always try not to say things I "won't" do when I have kids because I know it's about what they need and want and not what I want hahaha

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  5. Haha, I said the same thing about TV! She doesn't want much, but she does watch it! Thanks for linking up to Mamas Tell All. :)

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  6. Great post...I love the caption under the first photo! I think it's easy to say how you will parent and what you will and won't do UNTIL you actually have a child. Life then becomes all about surviving; whether it's surviving the moment or the day.

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  7. exactly! (and thank you). some days your survival skills have to take over your parenting skills. especially when you're lacking sleep and you don't want the kids to take over the house. haha!

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  8. haha totally understood!! and yes. it's hard to see what they need until they're actually here.

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  9. thanks so much for the kind words! I know you'll be a great mom too. :)

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  10. exactly! my two watch enough of it for it to count. luckily they prefer being outside more than anything. :D I have little dirt loving babies.

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  11. oh man... that Never have I ever game we played with MY PARENTS?! that was fun.

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  12. I feel ya on the tv & bottle thing. I try at times not to give Kenzie a sippy cup of milk at night, & most nights I dont. But those nights that she yells MILK 500 times, it means she is thirsty & I am giving her some damn milk! :P

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  13. Love it! Couldn't agree more. My dad got onto me one day for not hovering over my son every second. I finally told him that if I did that he would never learn/grow. Especially with him crawling he is learning his environment and doesn't need his mom watching his every movement. I let him do whatever as long as he is in the "safe zone" of the house!

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  14. :D We have a safe zone in the house too. It's growing smaller since Ainsley can mostly open doors now, but yeah... we let the kids explore outside. Zander never fell off the playground, but Ainsley won't do it again! LOL. <3

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  15. YES! There's only so many times I can tune out the repetition. hahaha! She'll be fine. my kids are fine. they're all OK. we know what we're doing. most of the time. ha!

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  16. I am not a mom yet so part of me is still hanging on to my "never will my child..." things. I know the reality is most if not all of those will happen. but there is still a part of me that likes to think I will be SUPER MOM

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  17. Oh boy have I been there with the eating crow!! I would never EVER co-sleep. (until I gave birth to a child who refused to sleep when not attached to me). I'd never put my kid on a leash. (Until she took to running off at full speed in Heathrow airport. Every. Time.) We do what we have to do - mama survival mode!! :)
    I'm with you on the not making a big deal about scrapes and bumps - she looks to me to see if it's something she should be upset about, so why make her get in an uproar for no reason!

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  18. hahaha!!!! "Then the next thing you know, you're the mom taking a swig of your adult beverage because your kid totally watches TV while you cook." So funny! I am for sure that person right now... and I'm sure I'll be kicking myself when I actually become a mom, haha!

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  19. I have that type of list in my head. I'm sure that all the things that I say now will probably change. But that makes it fun!

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  20. Oh, goodness! I think we all create these lists in our minds :) It's so weird what a little dose of reality, or rather being on the other side of the fence, will do to a person's point of view. It's definitely one of those things where you really don't know until you get your hands dirty. We make these lists and then when it's time to get our hands dirty, our lists get tossed up in the air. And I think that's okay - I think it should be that way. Otherwise, how do we stay sane?? :) love this.

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  21. exactly to all of this! it's hard to really imagine what you're going to do as a parent since every kid is so wildly different. thanks for stopping by! Glad you liked it. Have a great weekend

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  22. it is fun! :) there were so many more things I said I wouldn't do, but then this list would've been super long. hahaha. you have to just go with the flow

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  23. HAHAHA I'm sure I'll be getting a phone call from you at some point with "well, Melissa... I'm kicking myself now" haha. we'll just be playing never would I ever mom edition together. ;)

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  24. OMG co-sleeping! I didn't even think about co-sleeping but YUP! Said i wouldn't then I did with Ainsley. She was breastfed and from 4 months old to 8 months old she wouldn't sleep at night. so I let her sleep with me and comfort nurse. sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. Mama Survival Mode is EXACTLY it! hahaha! It's good to know other moms get it

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  25. you WILL be super mom. all moms are super moms in some form or another. when we're functioning on two hours of sleep or less and still managing to do things during the day- super moms! lol. you can do it!

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  26. I think our little girls might have a lot in common - that sounds so familiar!! Seriously - it's all about doing what you have to do. Mamas gotta sleep too!!!

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